Twitter's 19 Funniest Excuses To Get You Out Of Jury Duty
Twitter users give their best excuses to be excused from jury duty and you might actually want to use some of these next time.
I served on a jury shortly after graduating college. It was fine, because I didn't have a job at that point and didn't have anything better to do.
However, if you were to ask me today to serve on a jury I would do whatever I could to get out of it. I have too many other things on my plate to worry about small stuff, like the pursuit of justice. I could simply say that I don't think I can be impartial and that normally gets you off pretty quickly. But that seems boring so I think I'll use one of these more creative responses.
1. Does the tapeworm get a say?
2. Do you want to go against the prophesy?
#GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words end every sentence with "according to the prophesy"
— Nunya (@nunyabiz315) September 8, 20173. I think we're done here.
I know they're guilty. 💁🏽♂️ #GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
— Gregory Pizarro Jr. (@gregpizarrojr) September 8, 20174. Everyone loves it when the jury jokes around.
#GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
"Will the Accused please come before the Judge?"
⬇️
5. This is how I react to the law.
My erection won't stop.
— mᎥᏦᎬ ᏞᎥᏆᎬᏒᎪᏞᏞᎽ (@SkippyMcGizzard) September 8, 20176. What would you expect me to do?
"Do not judge others" - #Jesus
St.Matthew 7:1 NLV#God #HolySpirit #Bible #Christian #Inspire #Success #Weekend
— Holy Bible Today (@holybibletoday) September 8, 20177. Hahahahaha!
#GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
There's laughter in manslaughter
8. No touching!
9. Good job!
Applaud after every answer #GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
— Lemon Tart (@LoveLemonTarts) September 8, 201710. Meow meow meow.
#GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
Answer everything in meows.
11. I love pretending.
#GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
Can I play Judge?
12. You'll get out of jury duty, but find yourself right back in the courtroom.
13. What? This is how we used to do it.
bring rocks for stoning #GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
— Mimi (@mimidancer) September 8, 201714. Go on. Quiz me.
I'm a law professor. #GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
— lawprofblawg (@lawprofblawg) September 8, 201715. How do you expect me to sit through this?
Ask everyone for weed ... #GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
— Mattrick (@MClittlebigg) September 8, 201716. Oh boy.
Hitler tattoo on forehead #GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
— Tomas Heart (@catheternebula) September 8, 201717. He only writes in squiggles.
Note from imaginary friend. #GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
— Sir Dude (@FoolWearsBlack) September 8, 201718. Sup?
#GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
Show up like this
19. Uh...
lets use death penalty #GetOutOfJuryDutyIn4Words
— Mimi (@mimidancer) September 8, 2017ncG1vNJzZmivp6x7pbXSramam6Ses7p6wqikaKCloryze5FpaHBnYG58cYSOa21vpKmOfKvB0bJkna2krnqmxMKuqp6r